Day 32 - Deewana Bana De

For life to be interesting, you should make fun of others. You should be made fun of. Else life becomes too bland.

- Leo da Mirci in his book “ A recipe to failure - how to make bland dishes”.

A small imagination of what would happen if cricketers enter into Bollywood. A bit long. Forgive me if it is boring.

Pre-Script:

Sony Set Max’s viewership increased by a huge number during the ICC Champions trophy. Sony Max feels that its Extraa Innings featuring Rohit Roy, Shonali Nagrani and Mandira Bedi (who till a few days back thought that 20-20 is a game played with 20 players on each side) was a huge hit across the country. The channel claims that adding Filmi Flavour to cricket was one of the most important reasons for this increase in viewership (another important reason being Mandira Bedi’s costume designer). “The channel has plans to add cricket to entertainment too”, says Charu Sharma on behalf of Sony Max.

Current Scenario - The Background: (too much of B-School pressure => headings)

After the recent defeat in the ICC Champions trophy, the dismal performance in ODIs in South Africa, and the bashing it is getting from all quarters the entire Indian team is dejected. The Board of Sony thinks that this is the right time to get the cricketers into the entertainment domain. Sony plans to produce a movie with the Cricketers as the main cast. It sends a team (of a few cricketers dropped for the SA series) headed by Charu Sharma to South Africa to talk to the captain, Rahul Dravid & the current players regarding the new venture. Rahul after a bit of convincing, agrees to talk to the team about the new venture. Most of the team members feel that their ad revenues will drop after the South African tour. They think that the only other way to earn revenues would be to be a part of Bollywood (they never think of practicing). So the team agrees to be a part of the movie. A meeting of the Indian team members is convened to discuss and decide upon the plot and the actors.

Venue: The Indian dressing room South Africa

The entire team (with Greg Chappell) enters the dressing room..

Rahul Dravid: Welcome gentlemen!!!

Munaf Patel to RP Singh: Isnt he the gentleman?

Rahul Dravid(hearing some murmuring): Who is that talking? You know guys. I want perfect discipline here. This is a crucial meeting for all of us. Please stop talking.
Gentlemen, we are all here to discuss about the plot of the movie and the roles we will be taking up. You know guys, I have got good news for you. Steven Spielberg has agreed to direct the movie. Chappell will be the Assistant Director. It will be fun, don’t you think so?

Harbhajan: Captain, Pehle yeh bolo, yeh Steapen Spealebergu kaun hai?(first tell me!! who is this Steapen Spealebergu?)

Rahul Dravid(to Bhajji): Bhajji pehle yeh bolo. Why haven’t you tied your hair? First tie you hair... The SGPC is waiting for you!!! This happens always, have Royal whisky at night, forget to tie your hair and get into controversies!!!

Rahul Dravid(to the team): Ok guys. Lets first decide on the hero. Whoever wants to be a hero please raise your hands.
(All hands raise)

Rahul Dravid(to himself): Now raise you hands , when I call for practice switch off your mobiles.
Rahul Dravid(to the team): See not everybody can be the hero, you know. Please tell me one by one, why you should be the hero. Lets do it in the batting order… Sehwag start!

RP Singh to Munaf Patel: Arre this is unfair!! Humko chance nahi milega (We will not get a chance)
Munaf Patel to RP Singh: Abey chup. Yeh batting order jalti collapse ho jayega. (Dude, shut up. You don’t know about our batting order. They will all collapse soon. We will get more time to speak than the entire top order put together.)

Sehwag(ready for his speech): Guys, with my new funky hair style(?) I’ll become a heartthrob among the girls.. Aarthi often says that I look too good. Moreover, people have seen me as a hero in the Hero Honda Ad. So that would help too. The number of fans I have is increasing you know!

Munaf Patel to RP Singh: Yes even his size keeps on increasing day by day… The only thing that is decreasing is his average!!! By the way he has no hair on his head... Why does he call it a hairstyle?
RP Singh to Munaf Patel: Ha ha!! You’re right!! Munaf, tell me - how can he become a hearththrob among girls?
Munaf Patel to RP Singh: Arre yaar, Kenya mein Odumbe bhi Hero hai!!! (Hey dude in Kenya, even Odumbe is a hero)
(Both laugh silently)

Rahul Dravid: Ok. Sehwag thanks. Now Sachin… start!!!
(Everybody turns towards Sachin and find him sleeping)

Rahul Dravid(in a loud voice): Sachin.. stop sleeping and say something.
(Pathan wakes Sachin up)

Sachin(half asleep – hears only the words “say something”): Thanks Ravi, the pitch was flat and the ball was coming on to the bat. I thought if I could stay till the end overs, it would be good for the team. I might waste hundred balls to move from 99 to 100 but still I consider myself playing for the team and nobody should criticize me. Because I am Sachin. Main kaun hoon? Mera tennis elbow kahan hai?

Rahul Dravid(shouts): Sachin!! Sachin wake up!!! Tell me why you want to be a hero…

Sachin(awake now): Oh!!! Sorry Dravid… Had a bad dream. Coming to the hero point, you can see that even if I don’t play well I will be in the team and people come to watch me. Similarly, I thought even if I don’t act well everybody will watch my films. I thought I have more fans than anybody else in the country (excluding Thalaivar Rajnikanth, of course). I have acted in more ad films than all of you put together. So given my past experience ….

Chappell (interrupts): Sachin… stop talking about your past experience. Only current performance will be taken into account in my film. What do you say Rahul?

Rahul Dravid: Whatever you say sir!!! (to himself - Why would I risk saying something? I know your proficiency in writing letters to the BCCI. There are people waiting in the BCCI office to leak the letters to the press. I am a gentleman, Mr. Chappell; but a clever gentleman, you *&^%$#)
(Suddenly there is a loud noise in the room; Sourav, Azhar, Jadeja and Sidhu enter into the room shouting “Ooh aah India Aaya India!!”)

Charu Sharma: Why are you people late for the meeting?? Hey, Sidhu!!! I read that you are in jail…

Sidhu: No, Charu. I was on bail. Not in jail. The difference between jail and bail is as good as the difference between the poor and the rich. All that makes the difference is a bit of money!!! Anyways, Hi everybody… It is good to be here for the meeting! This place is excellent!!! The feeling of being in the dressing room is as good as a vegetarian having chicken pox. You have chicken in you and you don’t have to eat it. And what more!!! You still remain a vegetarian.

RP Singh to Munaf Patel: What does that mean?
Munaf Patel to RP Singh: I am sure even he does not understand what he says!! Don’t ever try to ask him.. He will reply with another one of his Sidhuisms!!

Azhar: Hi boys!!(I love calling you so) It has been a long time since I met you. I have been busy in my gym… Boys, I want to be frank. I hate the movie world. Because Sangeeta hates it. But boys, I can book tickets for any movie for you people. I have lot of bookie contacts you know!!! One more thing boys…I wanted to meet Gibbs in South Africa… I heard that he has been avoiding me. Boys if you can find him please tell him that...

Sourav(interrupting Azhar): Azzu!! Enough!! lets not call them boys any more…They are all grown ups now..(in a low voice - I helped these *$%^& grow up in the team and look at my fate now) Hey guys, how are you!! It is your Dada… I missed you so much. And you know what? In my leisure time at home I prepared a plot for the movie (instead of playing the Ranji trophy). I have got a very good story for the movie. Let me narrate to you the story.

Charu Sharma: Make it short, Dada. We are already short of time.

Sourav(angry): How dare you use the word short in my presence? You know how much I hate short ones. I have even stopped wearing shorts!! Ok leave that. Let me tell you the crux of the plot in detail (??)

This is the story of a guy who is the king..hmm….let us say the Prince of Bollywood!!! All the movies he acts in as the hero are big hits. Many new actors get a chance to act because of him. He forms his own team, and uses the same cast/crew in all his movies; even the director and producer are the same. Once on a foreign shooting schedule, the hero fights against a few Englishmen. Half way through the fight the hero gets out injured. Believing that nothing can save his team, start his prayers at the Lords; somehow, his friends display lots of courage, fight till the end and defeat the Englishmen. Charu, you know, here we can have a song with my shirts off…just like Salman does in all his movies!!! Everybody in the country is now a fan of the hero.

And then comes the tragic part of the movie - this winning combination does not last for long. One day, his director Mr. Right falls ill and leaves India. The producer Dalmiya also loses money and power. The new producer comes in and he selects a new director. Problems crop up between our hero and the new director. A few movies flop and the director wants the hero to be replaced. He does not want to give him even a small role in the movie. As usual, the people of West Bengal (who oppose anything that is good for the country) oppose our hero’s removal too. They want him back as the hero; or at least in a small role in the movie. But nobody listens to what they say, as usual. Our Prince now sits down in his house watching old movies he has acted in.

Let us end it here, with a note saying how great people are ill treated in India!!! We in Bengal love tragic endings. Lets spread this phenomenon across the world. What do you say Charu? How is my story?

RP Singh to Munaf Patel: May be at the end of the movie we can have Sourav in a Pepsi ad saying “Mera naam Sourav Ganguly hai. Bole tho nahi…Jo hua, kyun hua, kaise hua. Yeh sab soch ke dhukh bhi hotha thaa; ghussaa bhi aatha thaa. Par ab nahi. Main bollywood mae vaapous aane keliyae bahut bahut (dance) practice kar raha hoon. Kya maalum… heronies ke saath shirtless dance karne kaa mujhe aur ek moka mil jaaya. Jo bhi ho… bollywood ka andhar ya baahar..main chup bhaitnawaala nahi.. ooh aah..ouch.. iodex!!! aa yaa iodex. bollywood ke har movie ka fight scene mae main aise hi chill aaongaa. Aap bhi chillaayaengae.. mere team ko iodex zaroori hai… mere team ko acha lagaega… apni dada ki baat suneginaa?”
(Munaf Patel laughs out loud and everybody turns back)

Sidhu: Look!!! this kid is laughing when the Prince is speaking. This is what the Indian team lacks. Dsicipline!! I am telling you.. (Sign board for adults below adult level - Censored Sidhuism ahead) This is like a married couple playing handball. The guy doesn’t end up screwing his wife unless he first gets his hands on the ball. (Puritanists who just read the above line can now go see your Parish priest)

Jadeja (in a low voice to Sidhu): Sherry, see Sonali Chander is the only person in the world who can understand what we both speak…and nobody else cares about our comments!!! So shut up..

Rahul Dravid: Ok ok.. You know guys. This is not taking us anywhere.. Let us decide the heroine first…
(Voices heard) Sangeeta, Nagma, Kim Sharma, Sania Mirza, Shilpa Shetty, Dimple Kapadia, Yuvraj Singh!!!

Charu(interrupts): No No No!!! Peace people...Shanthi Shanthi...The heroine is already decided. Anything with Sony & cricket it will always be Mandira who is the heroine. We have even decided on a few promotions with Mandira’s champions trophy clips..

Munaf Patel to RP Singh: May be they should use the clip where Mandira asked Tony Grieg “Tony!!! now that Gilchrist is injured, whom do you think will open the fielding for South Africa?” Can you believe it? Mandria is the heroine!!! Yeh comedy movie hai kya??

Charu(continues): And we would better have our captain as the hero. Sony Max has a plot. Since the team cannot come to a conclusion we will go with our own plot.…

The movie revolves around the India-Pakistan rivalry. Pakistan plans to destroy India. Since they cant win anything face to face, they use one more of their cheap tactics. They send drug dealers to India. Pakistan wants to create a huge drug market in India and supply drugs to the Indian Army. They come up with an intelligent plan(by Pakistan’s standards) that they would attack India when the Indian soldiers are all on drugs (???). They send their main drug dealer to India. You know, with his knowledge of drugs, Shoaib would be perfect for this role. Against him is the captain of the Indian Army, Rahul.

Rahul consults the eternal captain of India, Vijaykanth to find out where the terrorists hide. Vijaykanth with his widespread experience in this area(14 films, 2 guest roles & a terrorist capture count of 149) helps Rahul identify and gun down all the terrorist drug dealers. Somehow Shoaib escapes with a few others.

In the climax Shoaib comes down running all the way from Pakistan to hit Rahul. Rahul stops him with one finger and Shoaib falls down right under Dravid’s feet. There he lies under Dravid’s feet, unable to move just like a cricket ball. Shoaib loses all his energy and returns back to Pakistan and starts running again. Meanwhile Rahul beats all other drug dealers, the first man, second man, third man etc.. one by one..As he usually does, Rahul hits their balls (towards the point area), pulls them, lifts them over the head and flicks them finally, making sure that all these guys reach the ropes!!! By that time, Shoaib reaches India. However, he is unable to fight against Rahul as he gets injured because of running too much…You know, Shoaib would be the best choice for this role… He even has the experience of acting injured!!!

(The door opens and somebody in a Sony SET Max T-shirt gives Charu a note)…

Charu(after reading the note - in a sad voice): Sorry friends…Maa Prem Ritambhara, our official tarot card reader has predicted that this movie would be a super hit. So the Sony Executive Board is pretty sure that this movie will be a big flop. They are no longer financing the movie…..(after a pause) It has been dropped. I am extremely sorry friends..The meeting has to end now..

(All cricketers are so dejected and start moving)

Sidhu(shouts at the top of his voice): I cant believe this!!! Sony Max is behaving like a pizza delivery guy who loves his job. Even if his wife gets pregnant he would want to deliver the baby!!! And you know what…If you push Geoffrey Botcott into a pool of....

(All cricketers start running as Sidhu starts one more of his Sidhuisms.)

The end.

Day 31 - Friends are not forever...

Writing this blog made me realize how much I miss my friends; I mean those really close ones!!!

We all have friends…. At all levels, kinder garden, middle school, high school, graduation, post graduation and so on….But why do you still want to go back home and have a look at the small playground where you played cricket?

At 25, at post graduation level – you have friends who are close but they are still far… Here there are very few people who are so close to you, very few people whom you can trust and very few people you prefer to be with. You smile at everybody, laugh with everyone, seem to have a good time with everyone but still there is always this nagging feeling that if you were given a choice you would have chosen someone else. The competition is tough(not so tough though) that there is every possibility that everyone’s true self will be revealed some time or the other. And it hurts when it is revealed. You do not want it to be… There are always some truths that better remain hidden… But you still cannot avoid knowing that your friend thinks that you are competition and that there is the other friend who speaks behind your back. You stop speaking out your heart for the sake of being diplomatic. You put a mask to your face and smile at them everyday, justifying it by saying that life at the corporate level is going to be the same… A line is drawn with friends, even with close friends… It says what questions can be asked, how one should behave and the rules involved in the friendship. It becomes a kind of a contract, a contract which gives benefits to both the parties…

But, but only a few years ago it was so nice…..

Just think of those days, when you just thrashed out the guy who made fun of you and the friend who supported you immediately without even thinking for a moment. There were no stakes involved and there was nothing to lose. You could just tell anybody on their face that he was committing a mistake. You were allowed to hate people and announce it to everybody. You always had the feeling that there were friends with you and they are going to be with you till the end of life. Think of the number of times you told your heart, “Why are my parents controlling me.. One day I will stay with my friends”. You planned to open a shop together and live happily… There were people who were actually close to you… You can still remember those places you had gone together, the girls you followed daily, the bus which took you back to school, the first day film shows and parotta stalls where you never went Dutch…The kuttichuvar which was yours, the place where you go back and sit atleast once and watch the small boys playing during your holidays… Remember you were all divided into teams, played cricket among yourselves daily and then suddenly one day you realized the bonding among yourselves when you played together against another team…There are these people whom you actually care for…Those people whom you first call when you are trying not to cry… call them up and start crying but still do not feel ashamed about…Those people whose voice would bring you instant energy… Those people whose “sorry “ really meant something…The only ones whom you called up the day your itinerary back home is decided and said, “Makka I am coming home in December..Come da”. Those people who are the first ones you call when you go home for your holidays and say “Makka, let us go somewhere da. Oor suthi evlo naalachu”. Those people with whom you can share the darkest secrets…Those people who were with you when money was not a factor… Those friends whose salaries never made you jealous…Those whom you are reminded of when you watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Those people who were really close… Missing them all…

Those times with those friends were all happy moments. All this happiness was in school and college when I did not earn anything , when I did not have money…Now I don’t have that happiness. I do not feel that real sense of happiness even though people think that I am…Is it all because I started earning money? Is it because I have money? No, that is just an excuse. It is not because I have money. It is because I think that it is important for life.

Day 30 - Never do it. It hurts...

I was trying to cry. I could not. Finally I started writing this and cried…

Nov 18 2006

“Some say that one should be a coward do it, some say that one should be brave to do it. But all I know and all that matters is that it is pain for everyone” - Leo da Mirci

If only I had known it earlier.....

I would have written a testimonial for you in orkut
I would have talked to you about the first train journey we had together and how much I enjoyed it
I would have told you that we friends often laugh repeating the comments you made during the journey
I would have told you that I laugh out loud reading your replies in the newsgroups
I would have told you that after reading your mudslinging format, I kept on telling friends that "He is a genius da... sema nakkal paaru"
I would have told you that your roomie often boasts that you are very sharp in understanding things
I would have told you that I loved the way you imitate our Finance Professor
I would have told you that you are one the very few persons whom I do not mind making fun of me
I would have told you that our first(and last) dinner with friends together was one of the happiest ones I had in life
I would have told you that your smile on the orkut profile photograph actually is so cute and childlike
I would have told you that I was in front of you when that photograph was clicked
I would have made fun of you saying that you forget more steps that you remember while dancing
I would have told you that I did not move much around with you but you were close to me
I would have spent the entire day with you
I know you would have made fun of me but still I would have told you how much I loved you
I would have told you that everybody on campus loved you
I would have told you that there are so many people who would be happy to be with you
I would have told you that it would be more pain for us than for you
If I had know it earlier I would have, would have... somehow stopped you...

You stupid, didnt you know that there are hundreds of people like me... who would have done all these...you could have told at least told one of them !!!
Goodbye da...

(For a friend who recently took a decision to end his life...)
Never do it anybody...It hurts...

Having been so close to what he did, I could not stop writing this....

Day 30 - Da Mirci Code II

“Part II of Da Mirci Code has no similarities with the Da Vinci code. Though the build up was too much, half way through creating the plot(??) I realized that Jyotika did not die in the climax and lost interest in continuing. I took more time thinking about this one than any of my other ones and hence it seems to be the worst one ever written by me. So here is just the gist of what I thought could have been the link between Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu and Kaaka Kaaka. Sorry to say that towards the end even I could not understand what the link was. It got too boring. Let me know if you really find any link.

- Leo da Mirci’s comments on Da Mirci Code Part II

Da Mirci Code Part II by Leo da Mirci

I have the feeling that Kaaka Kaaka is the next generation story of Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu. Back home, they call this feeling the Da Mirci instinct.

The following proof which has no evidence proves that Kaaka Kaaka is just the second generation’s story of Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu protagonists.


What could have happened

In Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu, Ilamaran and Amuthan are very close friends. Amuthan has two male children who grow in Keeranur. Ilamaran also has two children, a male and a female who grow near a village in Chennai.

The Amuthan and Ilamaran family:

Amuthan names his first boy Ilamaran out of love for Ilamaran (this boy is the Ilamaran in Kaaka Kaaka).

Ilamaran names his girl child Swati because of love for Amuthan (don’t ask me why). She is Swati - Devadharshini in Kaaka kaaka.

Amuthan names his second boy Srikkanth as he is a fan of Kris Srikkanth. (This boy is the Srikkanth, husband of Swati in KK - See the face similarity)

Since they are short of names by now, they decide to call Ilamaran’s boy child Paandya (Proof: See the voice similarity between Ilamaran of VV and Paandya)

Amuthan and Ilamaran adopt a child and name him Sethu so that he can become Paandya’s brother in Kaaka Kaaka.

They both make a pact that Srikanth will marry Swati. They write everything in a diary so that it can be used as a truth revealing instrument in the future.

The Raaghavan story:

Raaghavan sees Aradhana dead(Aradhana actually dies in the climax – their marriage clip was a graphics clip shown just so that the film does not flop). But he still remembers the promise he gave to Aradhana – “Ippola irunthu Neeyum Maayavum en sothu”. So he adopts Maya and brings her up. This Maya is the Maya you see in Kaaka Kaaka. (Proof: Can’t you see the face similarity between Aradhana and Maya!!!)

Raghavan marries again and gives birth to Anbuchelvan. (Anbuchelvan is 6 years younger than Maya and biologically they are not brother and sister and hence they can fall in love in Kaaka Kaaka – There is also one scene in Kaaka Kaaka where Anbuchelvan tells Maya “Enakkum unakkum oru 6 varusham vithiyaasam vera irukku”)

Raaghavan after killing both Amuthan and Ilamaran in VV comes to know about their children. By the time he reaches them, Paandya kills somebody and goes to Mumbai and Sethu had already become a rowdy. He brings the other children, Ilamaran, Swati and Srikanth and gives them to an orphanage and takes care of their expenses. He asks the orphanage owner to bring them up as police officers.

Suddenly one day, Raaghavan dies of lung cancer (Reason: After dying of blood cancer in Nammavar and Vaazhve maayam Kamal decides that he should die of something else). Suddenly the next day, Raghavan’s wife dies of brain cancer(i am running out of cancer types here). Maya is adopted by another family which owns a house inside a lake in Pondicherry. Anbuchelvan grows alone in his house (the house where he never opens the curtains).

The twist - Father’s diary:

Anbuchelvan reads his father’s diary and finds out that Ilamaran and Srikanth are growing in an orphanage. He calls them and asks them to join the police force. They form a team (naanga oru team!!!) and Arul joins this team (Arul is the son of Arun who marries Sandhya after divorcing Aradhana in VV). Also Raaghavan says in his diary that he should marry Maya to fulfill his wish (he couldn’t marry Aradhana and so his son marries Aradhana’s daughter - Balachander type father).

Srikanth reads his father’s(Amuthan’s) diary and finds out that it is his father’s wish to marry Swati. So he marries Swati. After some time he says “Swatiyaa thookitaanga Anbu”

Pandyaa reads his father’s diary and finds out that Raaghavan killed his father. He comes in search of Raaghavan and he finds only Anbuchelvan and no Raaghavan. He meets Sethunnaa. Soon Anbuchelvan kills Sethunnaa. Pandyaa decides to take vengeance on Anbuchelvan and kills Ilamaran, Swati, Srikanth & Maya (in that order). Towards the end, Anbuchelvan kills Pandyaa and Sathyaraj starts speaking…

Some secrets about Vilai Uyir endraalum – Gautam’s next movie…

Anbuchelvan’s daughter with Maya (secret daughter they had before marriage) is the Jyotika in Vilai Uyir Endraalum.
Swati and Srikanth’s son is the hero, Sarathkumar.
Pandyaa’s son is the villain. Sethunnaa son is the assistant villain.
Anbuchelvan dies of bone cancer. Sarathkumar reads Anbuchelvan’s diary and finds out that he has to marry Jyotika…. Paaandya’s son reads Paandya’s diary and the story continues…There is no end.


I am sorry if Leo da Mirci had bored you too much. Even I was.

Day 29 - Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu

Spoiler warning: Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu plot & climax revealed!!!

Leo da Mirci often says “A movie is one where I am in move after the V!!!”

I thought I should never review a movie on my blog or write anything analyzing a movie in my blog. But somehow after watching VV, could not stop writing.

The first half was excellent, sitting on the edge of the seat to know who committed the murders. But once the film entered the last one hour, it was nothing but a remake of Kaaka Kaaka (henceforth KK).

• Let us finish off the known stuff – Gautham, Jyotika, Harris, Thamarai, Vijay Antony etc. etc…


• Vettiayaadu Vilayaadu and Kaaka Kaaka - solli paarunga the tone is almost the same and the two words in each movie name start with the same letter (similarity konjam simple…. aaanaa powerful!!!)


• KK Srikanth is Amuthan here. In both movies he keeps on saying “Ila.. Ilaa”


• Amuthan in VV says “Raagahavaan….” in the same tone Paandya says “Anbuchelvan….”


• In VV, the voice of Ilamaran and his modulation is almost the same as Paandya in Kaaka Kaaka.


• In both movies, eppo paathaalum villains “Avla thookuvaen” “Ivala thookuvaen” nu sollittae alairaanga.


• The villains have long hair in both movie and they keep on repeating the famous three letter word in tamil!! (oth**)


• The meeting between Aradhana and Raaghavan on the road pavement is almost the same as the one between Maya and Anbuchelvan in the movie KK. Even a vehicle comes to hit Jyotika in both movies. However in VV she escapes.


• The climax is shot early morning in both movies. The bluish background color is almost the same.


• In VV during the climax scene where Raghavan meets Ilamaran on the top of a half-constructed building after the long chase, you can do nothing but remember Anbu and Paandya meeting in a similar place in KK after a long chase. Luckily in VV, we do not hear “Dei Tamilnadu Police!!!”


• Adyar Bridge….. in KK where Pandya and his gang are surrounded with vehicles from all sides and in VV where the body is hanged from the bridge. Even the time it was taken(the darkness) is almost the same.


• Paartha Muthal Naale - the song, if not the visuals reminds us of Ondra renda…


• Jyotika is kidnapped and held hostage. The villain calls the hero on his mobile and asks him to come to his place.


• Jyotika dies… (appa Jyotika saavula Gauthamku enna thaan santhoshamo!!!)

Even Kamal’s flash back reminded me of Vetri Vizha…(anothe VV) Amala, I think is kidnapped the same way in a van…

Gautham running out of ideas is adjustable, running out of actors (the same actors again and again) is acceptable, running out of dubbing artists and speech modulations is tolerable (Amuthan’s tone in VV, Pandya’s tone for Ila in VV etc…) but what is not at all tolerable is running out of names for characters – many names are repeated. (Maya, Ila etc…). I think there is a reason behind this (read last paragraph for the reason!!!).

Extra fitting

While I was watching the first half the murders reminded me a lot of the name “Ajith”. I felt that these murders, killing spree and everything – I have across somewhere in my life… A murder leading to the investigation of lot many murders that happened in the past, many people killed and buried in the same place, body parts cut into pieces etc…and somehow Ajith came to my mind again and again… I was afraid that I was some Ajith in my previous piravi who killed many people. Finally after a long time it dawned!!! JuinorVikatan… Anybody remembers “Kutravaali thappa mudiyaathu” by Ajith Aadhithyaa ? - a thodar on gruesome murders and how they were found out years after the killing. It was excellent…I was so interested in it that my parents stopped getting Junior Vikatan thinking that I would become a psychopath. Ok now, hte best part of this blog...

My next blog…

Vettaiyaadu Vilayaadu - the code points to Anbuchelvan!!!

Witness the biggest cover-up in Indian film history….It is so powerful….that men have died to protect it…and there are those who would kill to expose it. It is a message that has been hidden for three hours….. right before our eyes.

What if the one of Gautam’s greatest works in Tamil had the secret that could reveal a lot about another!!!

In my next blog… No matter what you have seen…….. no matter what you could see………. the journey has just begun…The secret is revealed!!!! The one that has been buried for generations…

Where Vettaiyaadu Vilayaadu ends Kaaka Kaaka begins – the truth untold!!!

Based on the Novel by Leo da Mirci -Da Mirci Code Part II !!!

Day 28 - Inspiration

To sleep when you think your dreams are dying, you got to be actually dead. -Leo da Mirci.

It is 9 a.m in the morning now. I have not slept. I lied down to sleep at 5 o’ clock in the morning. Till seven, I could not sleep. My name was not on the list. I jumped out of the bed and wrote a mail to the Professor asking him to reconsider his decision. I was waiting for a reply, as if he would check my mail at morning 8 o’ clock and reply. I kept on clicking the Refresh button. I knew it. I had gone mad. 10 minutes and he actually replied. I thought it would be a positive reply. It was not. I cried. As if somebody close to me died. I did not cry or feel sad when almost every company kept on rejecting me during my Summer Internship placements. It was only five to ten minutes of sadness and not even a single drop of tear when I came to know that I did not get a PPI Call from the company where I did my summer internship, something which I was so sure of. But for this, such a small thing I cried. Academics never made me cry. But there are always first times.

Nothing. It was just selection for an elective, called Social Entrepreneurship. Something that is close to my heart. Everything that is close to my heart. I thought that this course is going to help me more than anything I have learnt, to achieve my dreams. Except my close friends, I never tell anybody what I want to achieve in life. Not even in my B-School interview. I actually had written a write-up telling the Professor my aim and even who is going to help me achieve it. I never even go plead a Professor for extra marks which I don’t deserve. When people do it, I feel like they are begging. Yesterday night after I found my name missing in the list, I thought of begging him to take me into this course. I would never talk to a Professor (or for that matter anybody) to build rapport just for getting things done for me. I think it is losing self respect which I value a lot. Yesterday night I decided that I would go down to any level to get into this course. Generally, I used to think a lot before getting any sort of help from friends. Yesterday, I even thought of asking one of my friends to drop out from the course so that I can get into the course.

He gave me reasons…. that social entrepreneurship is different from business entrepreneurship, that the selection was based on the write-up I gave; it would be unfair for others etc. etc. But my mind refused to accept all these. I replied him asking for an appointment to discuss it. The last resort… He replied immediately saying that I could discuss with him anything except this issue.

I cried again. It was as if I failed in the first step towards my dreams. As if, somebody else snatched my dreams away from me. I was jealous for everyone who had taken the course. All negative feelings rushed in. I started writing this blog. Then, my mobile rang.

She never calls me in the morning. Yesterday night we did not talk. So she called me today morning. I picked up and she said “Eppo kalyanam pannikalam (When shall we marry?)”.

Bloody ****. To hell with everything else…. Now, this course means nothing to me. Now, I don’t care about whether the course is offered to me or not. I can achieve everything even without this course. Nothing can stop me now. Even if nobody else is there with me, I will do what I wanted to.

Sorry....We will do what we wanted to.

There is much more that inspires than information. - Leo da Mirci.

Day 27 - Extremely Professional Management

Miss you, my old computer - You never gave me problems!

I was happily working on my laptop until some viruses/spyware/Trojan/worm or something of that sort attacked laptop and my laptop became slow. All I wanted to do was remove the viruses/spyware/Trojan/worm. (Why the hell does this Office autocorrect trojan to Trojan?)

• Start - action!! Try removing them using Symantec Antivirus. Does not work. Laptop still slow.
  
• Spyware doctor requires a crack. Go to seriall.com to find a crack. Get to know new spyware that can attack your computer.
  
• Think of what to do. Try all possible virus removal tools. Install ->Next->Next-> Next->Finish -> Run virus scan -> Msg says “All viruses removed”. Ha ha...
  
• Get the happiness you get when you see “All Out” eating mosquitoes in the television ads.
  
• Laptop still slow. As if it is smarter than you.
  
• Ok done. Decide to format the laptop. Get a new Windows XP CD from distant friend.
  
• Remove all data from C drive and store it in close friends’ computers. Format C drive and install Windows XP. Windows installed successfully. Laptop is fast.
  
• Install all applications and start using them. Takes 5 hours approximately.
  
• After one day, realise that you did not back up the data on the desktop or the one in My Documents. Additional bonus loss - outlook messages and favorites that you had added for the last 1 year.
  
• Two days later. Laptop is again slow.
  
• Somebody suggests -> “Dei, all viruses would have been in D drive. So what you do is full format.” Here is where the real fun begins.
  
  
• Buy an external DVD writer thinking that all data should always be DVD backed up. We can uninstall the OS any time, load any data and always have backup.
  
• Goddamn external DVD writer works fine. Write all data into Moserbaer DVDs. Find messages like some “Joliet format” not satisfied etc. etc. Learn to ignore hurdles.
  
• Name the DVDs Leo_DVD_001 to Leo_DVD_005. Be proud of your naming conventions.
  
• This time be smart. Write Outlook messages, data on the desktop and my documents to DVDs. Anyways forget Favorites again. Remember “Errors when repeated become mistakes”
  
• Time for Full format. Get the same Windows XP CD from same distant friend.
  
• Boot from the same XP CD and it says “******.sys” file missing. Kadaisiyaaha ithae CDil pona vaaram kaanappattaar. Was found last, previous week in the same CD. Missing since then.
• Look for a different distant friend. But same CD(Windows XP).
  
• Installs Windows XP. Asks for CD key. Eject CD, look for key on the CD and key in the CD key. The key does not work.
  
• Brain works at last. Get CD key from the other CD where the .sys file is missing. Key in and it works(finally)
  
• Windows XP installed successfully. Go on a tour with them free of cost.
  
• Install MacAfee latest version bought by institute. MacAfee’s Virus on Access Scan shows “Buffer overflow” every now and then. Just a sumaal praablam.
  
• Insert backed up DVD named Leo_DVD_001 into laptop’s CD writer (CD-RW/DVD R). Be proud of your naming conventions again. Imagine naming your kids like this.
  
• Find that the CD Writer says that …or rather it does not say anything. Leo_DVD_001 not detected. Take DVD out insert in external DVD writer. It works fine.
  
• Repeat previous step with Leo_DVD_001 to Leo_DVD_005. Get same result. Reliability checked.
  
• Consistency check. Take DVD to friend’s laptop. Same company laptop. Same model. DVD recognized. Folders recognized. But unable to copy files.
  
• Come back to room. Search on Web. IBM site says that some firmware has to be updated for all DVDs to be read in the CD writer. Now problem shifts to CD writer. Hence Laptop suddenly becomes fast.
  
• Look for firmware updation software(CD image) in the internet. Download it.
  
• Website asks you to burn bootable CD with image just downloaded. Go to IBM Recordnow. It does not have a burn image option.
  
• Get Nero from institute software server. The serial crack does not work.
  
• Get Nero CD that comes along the DVD writer. Install that. Serial works.
  
• Insert blank Sony CD. Burn the CD with bootable firmware updation image. CD written. “Burn process Successful”. Postpone naming part. It is no more a required convention or one to be proud of.
  
• Content check. Insert burnt CD again to check the content that was written. It is still a blank CD. Look up and say “Why” instead of “How?”. Actually hear Bernard Shaw saying “Don’t ask Why? Always ask Why not?”
  
• Try writing image again. Half way through message pops up. “Buffer Overflow”. CD gone. This is what they call “Burning”(my heart).

The final status phasewise as on August 19th 2006, 3:50 a.m

Phase 1: Problem Identification phase

Problem identification successful. Problem could be with IBM R52, Windows XP CD, Windows XP Product, Symantec Antivirus, McAfee, Spyware Doctor, Nero, RecordNow, Moserbaer DVD, Sony CD, HL-DT-ST RW/DVD GCC(My CD writer), Samsung DVD writer, Joliet, my naming convention or any combination of these. Might be with me too, seriously.

Phase 2: Problem Analysis

Too much to ask for at 3:50 a.m.

Phase 3: Solutions / Alternatives Identification

Repeat formatting, search solutions on the net, go to sleep, download Emttan Mahan songs, play minesweeper or blog.

Phase 4: Choose best alternative

Blog.

Phase 5: Implement alternative

Done.

Phase 6: Realization phase

Understand that the alternative chosen was wrong. So go to sleep.

Day 26 - She, a beautiful miracle

“The world is full of miracles. However, some miracles are the world for you. You are one such beautiful miracle”.

I wrote this four days before our first meeting.

“It is 3.30 a.m Sunday, April 2nd now. Only 4 more days to meet her. Only around 105 hrs to meet her. Actually I don’t want to wait here to finish my exams. Ippavae, I want to meet her. The cute little girl (kutti ponnu) I was waiting for, for four years.

She made me laugh. She also made me cry.
She gave me happiness. She also gave me pain.
She made me achieve things. She also made me lose things.
She made me love my ‘love’. She also made me hate my ‘love’.
She brought sunshine in my life. She also brought darkness to a small period of my life.
She is the reason for the best day of my life. She is also the reason for the worst day of my life.

But all that mattered was that she finally said “I love you. More than yesterday. Less than tomorrow.”

So whatever happens to the whole world around me, whatever happens to me & whatever happens, I will make sure that

She will only laugh, never cry.
She will only achieve, never lose.
She will only love our ‘love’ and never hate me.
She will only experience happiness, never pain.
She will only see sunshine, never darkness.
She will only have best days in life, only the best.”

She, I love you. I can’t live without you. I miss you.

Day 25 - A brief history of Afghanistan

This blog is on one of the papers by Leo da Mirci which was a turning point in his career. This was the paper that marked his entry into the field of politics. This was the paper which made him one of the famous politico-economists of the world. Many people would have been interested in Afghanistan and the happenings in Afghanistan some time in the past. Here is Leo da Mirci’s take on Afghanistan’s politico-economy.

An abstract of the paper presented by Leo da Mirci at the Crazy Conference of the Capitalist Countries (CCCC) on June 21, 2006.

Abstract:

Afghanistan is a country which has a capital and it is a country which has people. People live in Afghanistan's capital. We shall look at these two important features, the capital and the people of Afghanistan in this paper on Afghanistan.

Capital of Afghanistan:

Afghanistan like most other countries has a capital. It is a good capital. Afghanistan’s capital is named after Afghanistan’s capital. It is a good name and people love it because it is named after their capital itself. The capital of Afghanistan is in the place where the capital of Afghanistan is located. The capital of Afghanistan is actually located near the places which are near the capital of Afghanistan. This makes it easy for people near the capital to go to the capital and vice versa. The headquarters of Afghanistan is its capital. It is surprising to note that that the capital of Afghanistan and Afghanistan’s capital have the same name. However, the people in Afghanistan do not get confused because by this, because both are the same places. What is more surprising is that Afghanistan’s capital is a proper noun and starts with a capital.

New Capital of Afghanistan:

History says that Afghanistan had an old capital before this new capital became its new capital. The old capital is now old. The new capital will become the old capital when they get another new capital. This will go on till Afghanistan exists and people exist in Afghanistan. Sometimes what can happen is that an old capital can become the new capital of Afghanistan. This in Afghanese terms is called “Kabul's theory of Capital Renewal”. Kabul is Afghanistan's new capital's name. When Afghnaistan gets another new capital the name of this theory will also change. Hence this theory is also termed as 'Dynamic capital theory'. The markets in the old and new capitals make Afghanistan one of the countries with high market capitalization.

People of Afghanistan:

Afghanistan consists of old and young people. People in Afghanistan are proud that they live in the capital. People live in the capital of Afghanistan because it is the capital of Afghanistan. Other people of Afghanistan who do not live in the capital of Afghanistan live in other places which are not the capitals of Afghanistan. According to Marwin’s theory of revolution, Afghanese people have evolved out of revolutions that happened in the country. The people of Afghanistan have two names. One is their original name. In addition to their original names they are also called “Afghans”. Marwin’s theory however does not explain whether they were Afghans and therefore in Afghanistan or they were in Afghanistan first and hence Afghans. This is famously known as the “Afghan Anomaly”.

The paper also gives a detailed review of the Kaptol’s theory and Marwin’s theory. It also tries to find out a solution for the Afghan Anomaly.

The paper ends by saying that

“People are important for a country. The capital is also important for a country. If and only if people are there markets will function. Without people there is no market. To sell vegetables, fish or anything in a market we need people. To buy vegetables, fish or anything we need people. However we cannot buy vegetables in a fish market or fish in a vegetable market. So the term market loses its meaning when there are no people as a market is resource dependant. Hence human capital (or people capital) is more important for a country than market capital or any other capital (like Afghanistan’s capital). This is a learning that the organizations can take from Afghanistan.”

Now you would understand why Leo da Mirci is respected throughout the world.

Day 24 - Crazy kavithais

Crazy kavithais at last.

கலரு ஃபிகரு

நீ ஆளு red கலரு
உன் முடி brown கலரு
உன் பல்லு black கலரு
உன் நெயில் பாலிஷ் yellow கலரு
கலர் காம்பினேசன் அங்கங்க மாறினாலும்
எனக்குன்னு கணக்கா இருக்கல்ல அது போதும்

அட்டு ஃபிகரு

என் அலாரம் இப்போதெல்லாம் ஆறு மணிக்கே அடிக்கிறது...
நீ தினமும் ஏழு மணிக்கு கோவிலுக்கு போவதால்...
என்ன இருந்தாலும் அணைச்சுட்டு எட்டே முக்காலுக்குத்தான் கண்விழிக்கிறேன்
நீ அட்டு ஃபிகரு என்பதால்..

வாழ்க்கையின் வயது

மானிடா...

உப்பு தப்பு செய்வதில்லை
கப்பு காபி குடிப்பதில்லை
கடியாரம் மணி பார்ப்பதில்லை
பணியாரம் பழம் சாப்பிடுவதில்லை
Lunchக்கு பஞ்சு அலைவதில்லை
கஞ்சிக்கு இஞ்சி அவசியமில்லை
அது போலத்தான் வாழ்க்கையும்...
வாழ்க்கைக்கு ஒரு போதும் வயசாவதில்லை!!

வாடி போடி(Contributed by Satin Gates)

வந்தா வாடி...
வராட்டா போடி...
ஆனா அடிக்கடி வந்துட்டு போடி...

நினைப்பு தான்(Contributed by Satin Gates)

நீ Coffee குடிக்க வருவாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
Tea குடிக்க போய் விட்டாய்
நீ Messக்கு வருவாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
Canteen போய் விட்டாய்
நீ என்னுடன் வருவாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
அவனுடன் போய் விட்டாய்
நீ அவனுடனாவது இருப்பாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
இப்போ வேறொருத்தனுடன் ஓடி போய்விட்டாயே!!!

e-காதல்

அன்பே நீ ஒரு முக்காலி
பாரு உன் மூக்குல ஈ
கண்ணே நீ நான் உட்காரும் நாக்காலி
பாரு உன் நாக்குல ஈ
பெண்ணே நீ ஒரு பெங்காலி
ஏன்னா பெண் காலுல ஈ
அன்பே நீ நான் உடுத்தும் கைலி
ஹா ஹா ஹா உன் கைல ஈ
போதும் போதும் ஓட்டியது...
நீ அழகு தான் காதலி...
ஐயையோ!! உன் காதுல ஈ..

Actually I am planning to publish a book with kavithais like these (I I O adikka varatheenga). At least with such kavithais I believe I will get a chance to write for Perarasu's movies. Till I get a chance the sufferings are only for those who read this blog.

Day 23 - Kaadhal konjam....

As usual, I am so busy with no work. So blogging.
எனக்கு ஒரு ஆசை... நல்லா இருக்குற தமிழ் பாடல்களின் மெட்டுல நாமளும் பாட்டு எழுதணும்னு. ஒரு பாட்டு கூட சரியா எழுத முடியல. அதனால Leo da Mirciயோட கவிதை தொகுப்பில் இருந்து ஒரு பாட்டு, நான் எழுத நினைச்சது போல...


(பாடல் - என் மேல் விழுந்த மழைத்துளியே - மே மாதம்)


நீ காதலைச் சொன்ன மறுகணமே
சுவாசிக்கக் கூட மறந்திடுவேன்
நம் இதயம் இணைந்த நொடிப்பொழுதில்
புதிதாய் பூமியில் பிறந்திடுவேன்


உன் பார்வை பட்ட பனித்துளிகள்
பருகியே நானும் வாழ்ந்திடுவேன்
உன் பாதம் தொட்ட இடமெல்லாம்
இரவினில் சென்று வசித்துடுவேன்
உன் கைவிரல் தீண்டிய காற்றைத்தான்
வாழும் வரைக்கும் சுவாசிப்பேன்


நீ கண்கள் மூடி திறக்கும் முன்பு
பூக்களால் பூமியை நிரப்பிடுவேன்
உன் சேலை உரசிய மலரெடுத்து
ஓவியங்கள் நான் வரைந்திடுவேன்
உன் இதயம் துடிக்கும் இசையெடுத்து
ஓவியங்களுக்கு உயிர் கொடுப்பேன்
உன் உதடுகள் சிந்திய சொல்லெடுத்து
உயிருக்குள் காதலை எழுதிடுவேன்


நீ காதலை மறுத்தால் மறுகணமே
சுவாசிக்க நானும் மறந்திடுவேன்
நீ இல்லை என்று சொல்லி விட்டு
இமைக்கும் முன்பே இறந்திடுவேன்


உன் கைவிரல் தீண்டிய காற்றில் நான்
உணர்வுகளாக உறைந்திருப்பேன்
உன் சேலை உரசிய மலரெடுத்து
என் உணர்வுகளுக்கொரு உடல் வரைவேன்
உன் இதயம் துடிக்கும் இசையெடுத்து
என் உடலுக்கு நானே உயிர் கொடுப்பேன்
உன் உதடுகள் சிந்திய சொல்லெடுத்து
உன் உயிருக்குள் காதலை எழுதிடுவேன்


எத்தனை முறை நான் இறந்தாலும்
மீண்டும் உனக்காய் அவதரிப்பேன்
எத்தனை முறை நான் உயிர்த்தாலும்
உனை மட்டும் தானே காதலிப்பேன்

Leo da Mirci.

Will soon come up with a crazy blog. Or some crazy kavithais...

Day 22 - Antha Oru Naal (One day Celebrity)

To say that “I am lucky” is an understatement. I have always been lucky, more than lucky. I always got what I wanted. Family, friends, job, education, love etc. etc… I should find some other word to describe it - “Lucky” is really an understatement. But my biggest luck – June 10 2004 here it is!!!

June 8, 2004

• I woke up in my flat, Thiruvanmiyur, Chennai.

• I wore an “I have to wash it at least today” category towel and took bath in cold water.

• There was a small problem with the television. It gets switched off when I switch it on. Got very bored.

• There were a few women from the nearby slums fighting like anything near the ground floor. I learnt two new Tamil words which I will never use.

• The local plumber knocked the room and asked me to donate for some Pooja. I refused. He gave me a look which said “Why do people like you still live in this world?”

• I had breakfast, lunch and dinner alone.

June 10, 2004

• I woke up in Maurya Sheraton, Delhi. (Alex told me that Clinton had stayed there when he came to India.)

• The television in my room had a separate channel to show the channels and the numbers. (They don’t call it a room. These semi-literate people call it a suite. I practiced a lot to pronounce it "sweet" and not "soot")

• For the first time in my life I wore a bath robe. (Or was it the first time I saw it?)

• I took bath in the bath tub for an hour. (Definitely the first time I am taking a...I mean, I am seeing a bath tub)

• Aishwarya Rai was staying one floor below my room.(Has nothing to do with the previous statement)

• This guy smiled at me when I asked him to pose for a photograph. He had a Mangal Pandey moustache.... no he actually was Mangal Pandey. Aamir Khan too stayed in the same hotel. (This actually has something to do with the previous statement - both Aish and Aamir represented Coke)

• Sunil Mittal asked me which place I was from. (Enga oorlayum Airtel connection irukku theriyumaa?)

• Ajith Pal Singh (the captain of the Indian hockey team, last time India won the Olympic gold) traveled in the same bus as I.

• Palache Sen sat next to me. (and gave a boring lecture on how passionate he was about India)

• I shook hands with Aishwarya Rai.(There is a full length comedy story behind it)

• Shankar Mahadevan had dinner with me, same table.

• Drums Sivamani asked me in Tamil, “Ennappa naan nallaa vaasichaenaa?”

• I talked to Mandira Bedi and had my brother talk to her over the phone. (My brother told me later that he asked her, “What is your role in Manmadhan?”. Her reply was - “Wait and Watch” - What else would she say about that role?)

• Saw Vivek Oberoi and Aishwarya together on the stage.(Rumours are afloat that the first spat between them was after I shook hands with Aishwarya)

• Somebody said “Excuse me”. I was obstructing her way. I turned back to see Simran.

• Saw Charu Sharma, Sheila Dikshit, Vijay Mallaya, Sunil Dutt, Anjali Bhagat, Rahul Bose, Kavitha Krishnamurthy, L. Subramaniam and a lot of celebrities.

• I was not that lucky. I could not see Rahul Dravid. (It is a little too much to ask for but I would have sacrificed all the above for that)

• Should be easy to guess why I was a celebrity

June 12, 2004

• I woke up in my flat, Thiruvanmiyur.

• I wore an “I have to wash it at least today+4” category towel and took a bath in cold water…

Hmm.....And life continued as usual.

Day 21 - What should I name it?

"Next time you go to bed, don’t think of how much you have earned that day, how many times your boss appreciated you that day or how many good things your colleagues told about you that day. Think of the time you did not give your loved ones, the time that you sacrificed to get all these. Think whether it is really worth it."
- Leo da Mirci.

My brother is like any other brother in this world. Nothing special. Whenever he comes home we sit around him hearing all the stories that happened in school, college and wherever he had been. He starts talking and we laugh, laugh and laugh. He smiles at everybody. He makes everybody smile. There is not a single person in the world who hates him. There is not a single person in the world whom he has hurt. Every time I told him “Please… do it for me”, he would say “Panraennaa” and run immediately for helping me. If I tell him any of my problems, he would immediately say “Naan irukkaenla anna kavalaipadaathey”(I am there anna. Don’t worry). He calls me “Lae Anna” - the perfect example of the respect he has for me and the very close friendship we share.

The testimonials his friends have written for him in orkut make me feel proud. He is just the type of person this world would be proud of. He goes beyond what he can do to help others, non-materialistic and kind. When he sees children on the road, begging he would say “I will do something for all such children some day. When I get my salary I will help them annaa”. He would have, but the problem is, one year after passing out from college, he hasn’t got his first salary.

I feel responsible. I haven’t spent for him, even 1% of the time I spent helping my friends.

When he was preparing for his entrance exams, he asked me to come home and help him. Instead I chose to spend time with my friends in college.

When he was in college I could have taught him everything. I never cared to. I spent my time enjoying life, creating problems for myself and solving them.

Whenever my mother asked me to teach him during my summer holidays, I told her “Amma, he will study if he wants to”, all because I wanted to enjoy my summer holidays.

When he finished college, he told me that he did not want to get into the software industry. I just asked him to continue searching for a job in the software industry. I did not even spend a minute thinking about what other career options he had. My post graduation became more important to me than his life.

And a lot more Whens… which I did not even care to remember.

Now, I sit down and think of them. I have not done anything for the closest friend I have in life. Agreed, he himself should have done a lot of things. He should have worked hard, he should have done this and that…but I worry because even if he had done nothing, I could have made a lot of difference in his life. But, I chose to be selfish.

Today I talked to him. He talked to me in a very low tone, a tone which was not the cheerful one I love to hear. I was left with a very heavy heart. Every moment my heart beats, it seems to say “If you had spent some time for him he would have been cheerful today”. I don’t know what else to say.

Day 20 - A world without underscores!!!

The beginning of a variable should not be an underscore - the first time I came across an underscore - as far as I can remember. Right from that day I hated underscores. Why does this world need an underscore? Couldn’t we have email ids if there was no underscore? Couldn’t we have variables without an underscore? Won’t we get free colour TVs if there were no underscore? Won’t we get rice at Rs. 2 per kg without an underscore? We would. Then why the hell do we need an underscore?

While I was working as a software engineer (we can have a separate discussion on whether it is right to call what software engineers do “work”, or whether it is right to call people in the software industry as engineers)… Ok. What was I saying…Yes, while I was working as a software engineer, I used to debug programs and create more bugs in the process. However what bugged me most during the process was underscores. Every program had hundreds of underscores. All variables were either read_data, write_data, customer_order, customer_name and hell lot of other underscored variables.

Why do you use an underscore when there is always an option of using a dot? I don’t understand. Here is a list of reasons why we should not use an underscore.

• Effort: You have to press two keys to type an underscore, the shift key and the underscore key. Once you press the shift key, you have to keep it pressed till your index/ring finger (or any other thing that you use to press underscore key) reaches the underscore key. This requires a lot of effort every time. Pressing a dot requires no effort.

• Efficiency: If we assume that for every variable, on an average we have one underscore, then for every variable we have in the program we can save one keystroke. Hence we can create more variables in the programs with the saved time and create more confusion.

• Time_1: It takes more time to press an underscore. An underscore is at a distance of around 2 cms to 3 cms from the shift key in an ordinary keyboard. After pressing the shift key the index/ring finger (or whatever you use to press the underscore key) has to move the distance of 2 cms to 3 cms before the underscore key is pressed. This results in unnecessary wastage of time that is crucial in a software engineer’s life. The time can be used for reading useless blogs like this. It can also be used for writing useless blogs like this.

• More_chance_of_Errors: If pressing the underscore is considered as a transaction, the transaction consists of two tasks. Either both the tasks should be complete or none should be complete (this is some atomicity principle). If the shift key alone is pressed, it will result in missing an underscore and if the underscore key is alone pressed it results in a dash. Hence there are more chances of errors occurring while coding if you use an underscore.

• Sticky_keys: Many a time we find that while we are using a shift key a window pops up and says “Sticky Keys” … This might be a big problem for programmers who do not know what sticky keys are, why they pop up etc. They might become nervous, perspire and finally all keys may become sticky…

• Time_2: The word Underscore takes more time to say than the word Dot. Hence if one of your friends asks you “Machaan, what is the name of the variable used in the sum function da?” you might find it temporally economical to say “Number dot one” than say “Number underscore one”.

• Underscores_more_than_two: When there are more than one successive underscores present in a variable it is very difficult to identify the number of underscores. But more than one dot in succession can be identified. (Type two or more underscores in a notepad and you will find that you get a straight line - Type more than one dot in a notepad and you can clearly identify the individual dots. From this we also find that, a line is a combination of underscores and not a combination of points as we studied in class 5th).

All the above factors that were discussed for variables hold good for email IDs as well.

Leave all the above factors. What hurt me most was seeing comments like

/*This program was written by Siva_Subramaniam */
/* The consumer_utility module was last updated by Alex_Pillai */

Using underscores for writing names!!!

Hence I request all you programmers, email users and any other underscore users to stop using an underscore and start using a dot. Let us stop this whole underscore bungle. Let’s do that before we start answering interviewers “My name Sir, I am Harish underscore Venkadakrishnan and my father is a share underscore market underscore trader.” Let’s create a world where there are no underscores, only dots.

Leo da Mirci always dreamt of a world free of underscores. In his book “Programming in Fancy Sea” he says

“As a programmer, I want to underscore the fact that one should dot one’s i’s and cross one’s t’s but never use an underscore. An underscore can never become a dotted line. I do not dream of a world without war. I do not dream of a world without poverty. I dream of a world without underscores.”


Hope you all under….understood what I wanted to convey. Bye till next time.

Day 19 - The First Meeting

Think of, dream, imagine what all could/would happen when you meet the person you love for the first time. How you would behave, what you would do… I sat down and thought what would happen.

The First Meeting

We both were from the same town. It was years after we first saw each other. It was months after I proposed. It was weeks after she accepted. We wanted to meet. We decided to meet.

There were a lot of constraints. Complex constraints. Our families were a little conservative. We were sure that our parents would get us married. But, we were also sure that our parents would never accept if they knew that we were in love. So, we cannot meet at our hometown. We decided to meet at the place she studied. It was on the way from my college to our hometown.

I was going home on vacation. I always take a train when I go home. She always travels in a bus. We cannot reach home together. And that meant that we cannot travel together. But we had to. We decided to take a train together from the place she studied. She would then get down at a station before our hometown and take a bus home. We were supposed to meet at her place at 12.30. Our train was at 3.30 p.m. She would be getting down at 7.30 p.m. We had around 3 hours in her place and 4 hours on the train to talk. And then we had one more year to wait for our next meeting.

Every time I woke up, every time she went to sleep, every time I went to the church, every time she prayed, every time I studied, every time she wrote an exam, every time I talked, every time she dreamt, all we were thinking of was our first meeting.

The day arrived. I reached her place at around 10.45 a.m. Her classes get over only by 12.30 a.m. I went to the railway station, kept all my luggage in the cloak room and walked towards the church nearby. We had decided that our first meeting should be in a church. She is religious. I am not that religious. I believe in prayers and not in churches or temples. However, I too felt that we should meet in a church. At least all my prayers have been answered till now. I reached the church at 11.45 a.m.

I was waiting for her inside the church. It was 12.30. Whenever the door opened, I would look for her face. It would be someone else. I was so anxious. I waited for ten more minutes. She didn’t turn up. I called her up. She said that her classes got over a little late and she would there in a few minutes. I came out of the church and sat on the verandah. It was 1.00 p.m. Already half an hour was lost.

It was 1.05 p.m when she stepped down from an auto. She was searching for me. I called her. “Hey Pattikkaadu, Eppadi irukka”. She smiled. “Shall we go inside the church”, she said. We went inside the church. We were alone in the church. She got her shawl over her head. She knelt down and prayed. Should have been the first time when everybody inside the church asked for the same thing to God.

After finishing her prayers she turned back at me and nodded. It meant, “We shall go”. We walked to a hotel nearby. “AC”, she said. We had lunch, south Indian meals. I was the one who was talking. She didn’t talk much. She only answered my questions; without even looking at my face.

It was 1.45. She was carrying a heavy bag. I offered to carry it. She said that she will manage. I didn’t want to insist that I will carry it for her and show her that I can carry heavy bags. I just said “When you feel that it is difficult, give it to me”. We walked towards the railway station. Half way through, she gave me the bag. I carried it.

We went to the cloak room and kept her bag there and went to the platform. We sat in one of the chairs in the platform. She started talking. As she used to talk over the phone. We talked about our parents. We talked about our families. We talked about our village. We talked about music and movies. We talked about our colleges. We knew it, but still we talked about how similar we were. I switched on my laptop. She was surprised to see a picture that she knew was hers on the desktop.

It went on… Every now and then she would look around and say “If somebody sees us, we won’t get married”. I would say, “Only if somebody sees us, we won’t get married”. We went to a juice shop. I said “I will take a Saathukkudi (Sweet Lime)”. She said she will take whatever I take. I said, “I should have asked for your preference first, illa?”. She said “Yes. Then I would have ordered a Saathukkudi first”.

It was 4.00 p.m when the train came. The train was late by 30 minutes. We boarded the train. She sat near the window. I sat next to her. She showed me all her photographs, right from her childhood. She kept on talking about the photographs. I showed her a few poems I had written about her. It seemed that we talked very little. But, the next time I looked at my watch the time was 7 p.m.

It was almost time to leave. She gave me two gifts. She asked me to open them only after she leaves. I wished I could open them immediately. Also, I wished she never leaves. The last half an hour, we didn’t talk much. We were concerned more about departing. The train stopped at the next station. She was leaving me. I carried her luggage. It was my heart which was heavy now.

I stepped out of the train. Our train was waiting for another train to cross. For the next half an hour, we stood at the platform facing each other, not knowing what to speak, not able to digest the fact that we won’t meet again for long. She said “It does not seem like we are meeting each other for the first time. It seems like we have lived together for years.” The other train passed by. Our train started. I got in. “Sari paakkalaam”, both of us said. I watched her moving away from me. Till she became the smallest point I can see.

I came back to the seat near the window. It was hers till a few minutes back. The gifts were lying by my side. I closed my eyes for a few seconds. I opened the lid of my laptop. I saw the picture on my desktop, the mother holding her child in her arms. I cried for the second time seeing it. It was 8:20 p.m, April 6, 2006.

The end of the beginning.

Day 18 - Year 22

"Is life worth it?" - Not for me as long as I am in Mumbai. Very busy(filim illappa). Still I thought I should spend at least some time for the person who made me write.

Today's log in my diary - the shortest ever:
==============================================
A in love - experienced dreams, remembering only C.
Happy Birthday.
==============================================

Reminded of two poems.

::::: Thaboo Shankar

"Ellaa naatkalum varuthappadukindrana. Un pirantha naalaai piranthirukka koodaatha endru"

"All days are sad. For, they did not give birth as your birthday"
=================================================================

::::: Vairamuthu's Thanner Desam

The gift that the hero gives the heroine on her birthday. The best I could ever think of!!!
=================================================================

Day 17 - Left right in the center

Almost everyone is writing a blog on Ganguly nowadays. Being a staunch supporter of Ganguly right from the beginning, I thought it was right and I had the right to write about Ganguly.

Right, lets start. Ganguly is a left batsman and a right bowler. But, a right bowler only on the right pitches. And never the right fielder. Ganguly drives left but writes right. Just because he writes right can he be considered right? Just because he drives left, can he be left out (of the team)? Was Wright right in thinking that Ganguly was the right man for the job? Wasn’t Wright himself left? Did Chappell have the right to write to the board about Ganguly? Did Chappell go beyond his rights to have Ganguly left out? Dravid, once Ganguly’s right hand and a right hander himself - why didn’t he write to the board in support of Ganguly? Why is the left supporting Ganguly? Is it because he bats left? Or is it because they are left with no other issues to fight with the center?

No one knows the right answers for these questions. Nobody has the right to ask the BCCI. All these questions will be left hanging in the air forever. Leo da Mirci proposed a solution to all these questions in these simple words

“When Wright was the coach, Ganguly was the captain and Ganguly was mostly right. Soon Ganguly was left out and Wright left the team. Now, Chappell is the coach and Dravid is the captain but Dravid can never be Chappell. So Dravid won’t be left out and so Chappell shouldn’t leave the team”. Leo da Mirci is right, right?

One thing I can understand from this solution is “Chappals shouldn’t be left out (of chapels or temples). They will be stolen by Ganguly (both the right and left ones).”

Right. I hear you saying “Stop writing and leave us right now”. I will. Before that answer this simple question that Ganguly asked recently when a reporter asked him about his batting…

“If I say I am left, am I right?”

It is difficult to answer even such simple questions. That is life!!!

Day 16 - Surprised!!!

Never ever in my life has a month’s time been as interesting and eventful as this. Staring from February 16th till today, it was a once in a life time experience, filled with surprises and happiness. Filled with surprises that ended in happiness.

My blog being quoted in a few sites, few of my friends(ok, only two) sending mails saying “I got your blog as a forward da!!!”, reading the last chapter of Ponniyin Selvan (literally full of surprises), reading Parthiban Kanavu and finding out how similar it is to my life, Leo da Mirci recovering from Coma, the new experience of being glued to my mobile phone for an hour without knowing what to speak and the coincidences (???) that occur in the process are quite a few to say.

A small account on each of these surprises.

Blog - I missed writing for a month.
Ponniyin Selvan - Don’t miss it.
Parthiban Kanavu - How did I miss the similarity!!!
Leo da Mirci - I missed him for two months.
Mobile phone - I had to pretend that I missed it for a few days. Now… I never miss a call, especially the missed calls.
Coincidences - Enough of them to make me say “I too miss you”.

I won’t have another month like this in life. Most of the days had events I will never forget. Actually, almost everyone.

Day 15 - Life and Love

My blog on Day 5 was after a mail I received that stunned me. This blog too is after a mail I received recently that stunned me(this time for a change it was good). A very long blog. So read only if you have enough time to.


Besant Nagar, Chennai - A few years back.

It was around 1 o’ clock in the morning. It was so cold. I was sitting on one of the steps in the verandah of the Besant Nagar church. It was filled with mud, papers and all kinds of dirty material. Swarms of mosquitoes were flying around me. There were a few people around me, sleeping soundly. I recognized one guy on the right corner of the verandah. Every week while coming back from the church, I used to pay a rupee to that poor fellow. ‘Now, I am sleeping in a place where he slept daily’. I couldn’t control anymore. Tears flowed down my eyes. I closed my eyes. No more tears. Sleep!!! Sleep!!! I slept there on the steps.

I woke up. It was 3.30 in the morning. I started walking towards the beach. I was alone in the beach. There was nobody around me. I thought, “What am I doing? Where is this life going?” The last few years had been pain. Nothing but pain. I needed a friend. I wanted to talk to somebody. But, nobody was there. A wave showered my feet. I saw the sea. May be it is calling me. I wanted to die. I wanted the waves to take me away. But… it would be more pain!!. Should I do it? No, I wont. I am not a coward… Or may be I am not brave enough to do it!! Tears…. again. I am going to do it. I stepped forward towards the sea. It was going to be the end.

Suddenly I heard somebody shouting. It was a policeman.
Yaarudaa athu?(Who is it?) - he shouted.

He started coming towards me. I knew what was coming. I took out my ID card. Before he could ask anything I started speaking.
“Sir, I am from this college”, I gave him my ID card.
“Intha timela ennappa panrae inga?” (What are you doing here at this time?).
His tone was soft now. Was it because he saw the card or because he saw my eyes?. I didn’t answer.
“How did you come here?”
“Bike sir”. “You are not supposed to be here after 10. Leave now”, he said.

I was surprised he didn’t ask any questions. He came with me to the church. I had parked my bike there. It was the only thing that had been with me for the past few years.

Finally he asked me, “Did you fail in your exam?”. I smiled...
“I have never failed in an exam”, I said. He looked back at me, confused. I started the bike. I took off to my hostel.

I did not asked the policeman’s name. I have forgotten his face. I don’t know who he is. It is ironic that sometimes, you don’t know some of the most important people in your life. Sometimes I think that God doesn’t exist. But he does.


Home - May, three months later

I was home for my summer holidays. Your results were declared that day. Whenever tenth standard or twelfth standard results are declared, I will be busy. People call up home, come home and ask me to get the results through the net. I got your register number as well, just one of the many I got.

Till that morning, you were just ‘another girl’ to me. The results started coming in. I saw your score. I told you the score. You were a district ranker. That meant being on newspapers for the next two days. I saw you jumping with joy. A little girl jumping with joy. I was happy for you.

My mother started telling me about you. I never cared to listen about any girl till then, for I thought no girl would ever look at me. I don’t know why, but I listened that day.

You mesmerized people with your speeches. You read all the books in the world. You were a celebrity in school. You were cheerful. You were beautiful. You played chess so well. You solved crosswords in moments. You loved puzzles. You never missed a quiz on TV. You fought for Vikatan. You loved reading poems. You painted so well. You were very intelligent. You were kind to people. You smiled, always. And finally you were so good at heart.

It was as if somebody was repeating all that I had in mind. The perfect person to share my life. The character I had etched in my mind, but felt that I was not worthy getting. You were the person I wanted to be in life. You were the person I wanted in my life. I knew nothing about you the previous day. It was as if I knew everything about you now.

Evening came. You came to my house. The first time I saw you so close. Smiling all the time. Happy as ever. You talked. I watched. Till then, I didn’t want anything in life. Now, I wanted everything in life. To share them with you. Everyday I came to know more about you, I started loving you more. And before my vacations were over, the unfilled part of the puzzle was filled. You got admission where what you wanted. You were going to be a !!!!!!

But………Unless I change myself I am not going to have a life with you!!! I changed.

I came back to college. I worked hard, harder than ever I had worked. For you. I changed. Letters to you filled up my diaries. I talked to you daily through them. I got a job. Only because of you. College was over. I joined my first job. I disliked it. I joined another. People at the job hated me. My diary was my sole outlet. All that was pushing me was you. I wanted to do something more. For you. I resigned my job.

I came home. I saw you. I talked to you. Very little. But that was enough. I spent the six months preparing for my MBA. I wrote my MBA exams.

I came home again. You too were at Cornigela. It seemed as if whenever I came home they sent you home on holidays. I worked hard. I read a lot. We talked a little about books. We smiled whenever we saw each other. I prepared for my interviews. Harder, harder and harder. You were there at your home all the time. Every day I heard your voice at least once. More letters went into my diary. You asked me to get a few novels for you. I got a lot of novels for you. You read them. So, I read them all. I worked hard, I had no worries, for you were there with me. I did well in my interviews. I got what I wanted. Admission for an MBA in a premier B-School. And then…… I saw a drawing of yours. A mother with a child. I cried… I took it with me wherever I went… I saw your face in that. I loved you more than ever.

I was in college after 2 years. I wanted to prove something for all that I didn’t do in my graduation. I had the drawing with me. It was enough to give me all the energy I needed. I became one of the top 5 in class. Something I would never have done if it hadn’t been for you. I watched episode after episode of Friends wishing that I would watch it with you one day.

I mailed you. I couldn’t wait. I mailed you again hinting that I wanted to share my life with you. You replied. But, you replied hinting that I was like a brother to you. You said you wouldn’t be mailing me back again for long. I cried. I took my diary to write a letter to you. There was only one page left. I opened my laptop to watch Friends. Only the last episode was left. It all seemed to be the end. I cried all day.

I came home for vacations. I couldn’t talk to you. The door was shut, I thought. It all seemed to be over. February 14th came. I drank for the first time in life. You are the reason for what I am now. And you might be the reason for what I will be in the future, I thought.

Two days passed. I got a mail from you. I couldn’t believe it. You wanted to talk to me. You wanted to chat with me. You said you will mail me every week. You said you wanted discuss everything with me. You said you had been longing for a friend like me. You said a lot more things. And finally you said, “Thanks for all the help you had done”…
Then, what should I say to you?


Two people. I know nothing about one. I know everything about the other. I cant remember one’s face. I cant forget the other’s. I will never meet one. I will never leave the other. Lots of differences. But both changed my life, forever. I will never forget them, never ever.