Day 27 - Extremely Professional Management

Miss you, my old computer - You never gave me problems!

I was happily working on my laptop until some viruses/spyware/Trojan/worm or something of that sort attacked laptop and my laptop became slow. All I wanted to do was remove the viruses/spyware/Trojan/worm. (Why the hell does this Office autocorrect trojan to Trojan?)

• Start - action!! Try removing them using Symantec Antivirus. Does not work. Laptop still slow.
  
• Spyware doctor requires a crack. Go to seriall.com to find a crack. Get to know new spyware that can attack your computer.
  
• Think of what to do. Try all possible virus removal tools. Install ->Next->Next-> Next->Finish -> Run virus scan -> Msg says “All viruses removed”. Ha ha...
  
• Get the happiness you get when you see “All Out” eating mosquitoes in the television ads.
  
• Laptop still slow. As if it is smarter than you.
  
• Ok done. Decide to format the laptop. Get a new Windows XP CD from distant friend.
  
• Remove all data from C drive and store it in close friends’ computers. Format C drive and install Windows XP. Windows installed successfully. Laptop is fast.
  
• Install all applications and start using them. Takes 5 hours approximately.
  
• After one day, realise that you did not back up the data on the desktop or the one in My Documents. Additional bonus loss - outlook messages and favorites that you had added for the last 1 year.
  
• Two days later. Laptop is again slow.
  
• Somebody suggests -> “Dei, all viruses would have been in D drive. So what you do is full format.” Here is where the real fun begins.
  
  
• Buy an external DVD writer thinking that all data should always be DVD backed up. We can uninstall the OS any time, load any data and always have backup.
  
• Goddamn external DVD writer works fine. Write all data into Moserbaer DVDs. Find messages like some “Joliet format” not satisfied etc. etc. Learn to ignore hurdles.
  
• Name the DVDs Leo_DVD_001 to Leo_DVD_005. Be proud of your naming conventions.
  
• This time be smart. Write Outlook messages, data on the desktop and my documents to DVDs. Anyways forget Favorites again. Remember “Errors when repeated become mistakes”
  
• Time for Full format. Get the same Windows XP CD from same distant friend.
  
• Boot from the same XP CD and it says “******.sys” file missing. Kadaisiyaaha ithae CDil pona vaaram kaanappattaar. Was found last, previous week in the same CD. Missing since then.
• Look for a different distant friend. But same CD(Windows XP).
  
• Installs Windows XP. Asks for CD key. Eject CD, look for key on the CD and key in the CD key. The key does not work.
  
• Brain works at last. Get CD key from the other CD where the .sys file is missing. Key in and it works(finally)
  
• Windows XP installed successfully. Go on a tour with them free of cost.
  
• Install MacAfee latest version bought by institute. MacAfee’s Virus on Access Scan shows “Buffer overflow” every now and then. Just a sumaal praablam.
  
• Insert backed up DVD named Leo_DVD_001 into laptop’s CD writer (CD-RW/DVD R). Be proud of your naming conventions again. Imagine naming your kids like this.
  
• Find that the CD Writer says that …or rather it does not say anything. Leo_DVD_001 not detected. Take DVD out insert in external DVD writer. It works fine.
  
• Repeat previous step with Leo_DVD_001 to Leo_DVD_005. Get same result. Reliability checked.
  
• Consistency check. Take DVD to friend’s laptop. Same company laptop. Same model. DVD recognized. Folders recognized. But unable to copy files.
  
• Come back to room. Search on Web. IBM site says that some firmware has to be updated for all DVDs to be read in the CD writer. Now problem shifts to CD writer. Hence Laptop suddenly becomes fast.
  
• Look for firmware updation software(CD image) in the internet. Download it.
  
• Website asks you to burn bootable CD with image just downloaded. Go to IBM Recordnow. It does not have a burn image option.
  
• Get Nero from institute software server. The serial crack does not work.
  
• Get Nero CD that comes along the DVD writer. Install that. Serial works.
  
• Insert blank Sony CD. Burn the CD with bootable firmware updation image. CD written. “Burn process Successful”. Postpone naming part. It is no more a required convention or one to be proud of.
  
• Content check. Insert burnt CD again to check the content that was written. It is still a blank CD. Look up and say “Why” instead of “How?”. Actually hear Bernard Shaw saying “Don’t ask Why? Always ask Why not?”
  
• Try writing image again. Half way through message pops up. “Buffer Overflow”. CD gone. This is what they call “Burning”(my heart).

The final status phasewise as on August 19th 2006, 3:50 a.m

Phase 1: Problem Identification phase

Problem identification successful. Problem could be with IBM R52, Windows XP CD, Windows XP Product, Symantec Antivirus, McAfee, Spyware Doctor, Nero, RecordNow, Moserbaer DVD, Sony CD, HL-DT-ST RW/DVD GCC(My CD writer), Samsung DVD writer, Joliet, my naming convention or any combination of these. Might be with me too, seriously.

Phase 2: Problem Analysis

Too much to ask for at 3:50 a.m.

Phase 3: Solutions / Alternatives Identification

Repeat formatting, search solutions on the net, go to sleep, download Emttan Mahan songs, play minesweeper or blog.

Phase 4: Choose best alternative

Blog.

Phase 5: Implement alternative

Done.

Phase 6: Realization phase

Understand that the alternative chosen was wrong. So go to sleep.

Day 26 - She, a beautiful miracle

“The world is full of miracles. However, some miracles are the world for you. You are one such beautiful miracle”.

I wrote this four days before our first meeting.

“It is 3.30 a.m Sunday, April 2nd now. Only 4 more days to meet her. Only around 105 hrs to meet her. Actually I don’t want to wait here to finish my exams. Ippavae, I want to meet her. The cute little girl (kutti ponnu) I was waiting for, for four years.

She made me laugh. She also made me cry.
She gave me happiness. She also gave me pain.
She made me achieve things. She also made me lose things.
She made me love my ‘love’. She also made me hate my ‘love’.
She brought sunshine in my life. She also brought darkness to a small period of my life.
She is the reason for the best day of my life. She is also the reason for the worst day of my life.

But all that mattered was that she finally said “I love you. More than yesterday. Less than tomorrow.”

So whatever happens to the whole world around me, whatever happens to me & whatever happens, I will make sure that

She will only laugh, never cry.
She will only achieve, never lose.
She will only love our ‘love’ and never hate me.
She will only experience happiness, never pain.
She will only see sunshine, never darkness.
She will only have best days in life, only the best.”

She, I love you. I can’t live without you. I miss you.

Day 25 - A brief history of Afghanistan

This blog is on one of the papers by Leo da Mirci which was a turning point in his career. This was the paper that marked his entry into the field of politics. This was the paper which made him one of the famous politico-economists of the world. Many people would have been interested in Afghanistan and the happenings in Afghanistan some time in the past. Here is Leo da Mirci’s take on Afghanistan’s politico-economy.

An abstract of the paper presented by Leo da Mirci at the Crazy Conference of the Capitalist Countries (CCCC) on June 21, 2006.

Abstract:

Afghanistan is a country which has a capital and it is a country which has people. People live in Afghanistan's capital. We shall look at these two important features, the capital and the people of Afghanistan in this paper on Afghanistan.

Capital of Afghanistan:

Afghanistan like most other countries has a capital. It is a good capital. Afghanistan’s capital is named after Afghanistan’s capital. It is a good name and people love it because it is named after their capital itself. The capital of Afghanistan is in the place where the capital of Afghanistan is located. The capital of Afghanistan is actually located near the places which are near the capital of Afghanistan. This makes it easy for people near the capital to go to the capital and vice versa. The headquarters of Afghanistan is its capital. It is surprising to note that that the capital of Afghanistan and Afghanistan’s capital have the same name. However, the people in Afghanistan do not get confused because by this, because both are the same places. What is more surprising is that Afghanistan’s capital is a proper noun and starts with a capital.

New Capital of Afghanistan:

History says that Afghanistan had an old capital before this new capital became its new capital. The old capital is now old. The new capital will become the old capital when they get another new capital. This will go on till Afghanistan exists and people exist in Afghanistan. Sometimes what can happen is that an old capital can become the new capital of Afghanistan. This in Afghanese terms is called “Kabul's theory of Capital Renewal”. Kabul is Afghanistan's new capital's name. When Afghnaistan gets another new capital the name of this theory will also change. Hence this theory is also termed as 'Dynamic capital theory'. The markets in the old and new capitals make Afghanistan one of the countries with high market capitalization.

People of Afghanistan:

Afghanistan consists of old and young people. People in Afghanistan are proud that they live in the capital. People live in the capital of Afghanistan because it is the capital of Afghanistan. Other people of Afghanistan who do not live in the capital of Afghanistan live in other places which are not the capitals of Afghanistan. According to Marwin’s theory of revolution, Afghanese people have evolved out of revolutions that happened in the country. The people of Afghanistan have two names. One is their original name. In addition to their original names they are also called “Afghans”. Marwin’s theory however does not explain whether they were Afghans and therefore in Afghanistan or they were in Afghanistan first and hence Afghans. This is famously known as the “Afghan Anomaly”.

The paper also gives a detailed review of the Kaptol’s theory and Marwin’s theory. It also tries to find out a solution for the Afghan Anomaly.

The paper ends by saying that

“People are important for a country. The capital is also important for a country. If and only if people are there markets will function. Without people there is no market. To sell vegetables, fish or anything in a market we need people. To buy vegetables, fish or anything we need people. However we cannot buy vegetables in a fish market or fish in a vegetable market. So the term market loses its meaning when there are no people as a market is resource dependant. Hence human capital (or people capital) is more important for a country than market capital or any other capital (like Afghanistan’s capital). This is a learning that the organizations can take from Afghanistan.”

Now you would understand why Leo da Mirci is respected throughout the world.

Day 24 - Crazy kavithais

Crazy kavithais at last.

கலரு ஃபிகரு

நீ ஆளு red கலரு
உன் முடி brown கலரு
உன் பல்லு black கலரு
உன் நெயில் பாலிஷ் yellow கலரு
கலர் காம்பினேசன் அங்கங்க மாறினாலும்
எனக்குன்னு கணக்கா இருக்கல்ல அது போதும்

அட்டு ஃபிகரு

என் அலாரம் இப்போதெல்லாம் ஆறு மணிக்கே அடிக்கிறது...
நீ தினமும் ஏழு மணிக்கு கோவிலுக்கு போவதால்...
என்ன இருந்தாலும் அணைச்சுட்டு எட்டே முக்காலுக்குத்தான் கண்விழிக்கிறேன்
நீ அட்டு ஃபிகரு என்பதால்..

வாழ்க்கையின் வயது

மானிடா...

உப்பு தப்பு செய்வதில்லை
கப்பு காபி குடிப்பதில்லை
கடியாரம் மணி பார்ப்பதில்லை
பணியாரம் பழம் சாப்பிடுவதில்லை
Lunchக்கு பஞ்சு அலைவதில்லை
கஞ்சிக்கு இஞ்சி அவசியமில்லை
அது போலத்தான் வாழ்க்கையும்...
வாழ்க்கைக்கு ஒரு போதும் வயசாவதில்லை!!

வாடி போடி(Contributed by Satin Gates)

வந்தா வாடி...
வராட்டா போடி...
ஆனா அடிக்கடி வந்துட்டு போடி...

நினைப்பு தான்(Contributed by Satin Gates)

நீ Coffee குடிக்க வருவாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
Tea குடிக்க போய் விட்டாய்
நீ Messக்கு வருவாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
Canteen போய் விட்டாய்
நீ என்னுடன் வருவாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
அவனுடன் போய் விட்டாய்
நீ அவனுடனாவது இருப்பாய் என்று நினைத்தேன்
இப்போ வேறொருத்தனுடன் ஓடி போய்விட்டாயே!!!

e-காதல்

அன்பே நீ ஒரு முக்காலி
பாரு உன் மூக்குல ஈ
கண்ணே நீ நான் உட்காரும் நாக்காலி
பாரு உன் நாக்குல ஈ
பெண்ணே நீ ஒரு பெங்காலி
ஏன்னா பெண் காலுல ஈ
அன்பே நீ நான் உடுத்தும் கைலி
ஹா ஹா ஹா உன் கைல ஈ
போதும் போதும் ஓட்டியது...
நீ அழகு தான் காதலி...
ஐயையோ!! உன் காதுல ஈ..

Actually I am planning to publish a book with kavithais like these (I I O adikka varatheenga). At least with such kavithais I believe I will get a chance to write for Perarasu's movies. Till I get a chance the sufferings are only for those who read this blog.

Day 23 - Kaadhal konjam....

As usual, I am so busy with no work. So blogging.
எனக்கு ஒரு ஆசை... நல்லா இருக்குற தமிழ் பாடல்களின் மெட்டுல நாமளும் பாட்டு எழுதணும்னு. ஒரு பாட்டு கூட சரியா எழுத முடியல. அதனால Leo da Mirciயோட கவிதை தொகுப்பில் இருந்து ஒரு பாட்டு, நான் எழுத நினைச்சது போல...


(பாடல் - என் மேல் விழுந்த மழைத்துளியே - மே மாதம்)


நீ காதலைச் சொன்ன மறுகணமே
சுவாசிக்கக் கூட மறந்திடுவேன்
நம் இதயம் இணைந்த நொடிப்பொழுதில்
புதிதாய் பூமியில் பிறந்திடுவேன்


உன் பார்வை பட்ட பனித்துளிகள்
பருகியே நானும் வாழ்ந்திடுவேன்
உன் பாதம் தொட்ட இடமெல்லாம்
இரவினில் சென்று வசித்துடுவேன்
உன் கைவிரல் தீண்டிய காற்றைத்தான்
வாழும் வரைக்கும் சுவாசிப்பேன்


நீ கண்கள் மூடி திறக்கும் முன்பு
பூக்களால் பூமியை நிரப்பிடுவேன்
உன் சேலை உரசிய மலரெடுத்து
ஓவியங்கள் நான் வரைந்திடுவேன்
உன் இதயம் துடிக்கும் இசையெடுத்து
ஓவியங்களுக்கு உயிர் கொடுப்பேன்
உன் உதடுகள் சிந்திய சொல்லெடுத்து
உயிருக்குள் காதலை எழுதிடுவேன்


நீ காதலை மறுத்தால் மறுகணமே
சுவாசிக்க நானும் மறந்திடுவேன்
நீ இல்லை என்று சொல்லி விட்டு
இமைக்கும் முன்பே இறந்திடுவேன்


உன் கைவிரல் தீண்டிய காற்றில் நான்
உணர்வுகளாக உறைந்திருப்பேன்
உன் சேலை உரசிய மலரெடுத்து
என் உணர்வுகளுக்கொரு உடல் வரைவேன்
உன் இதயம் துடிக்கும் இசையெடுத்து
என் உடலுக்கு நானே உயிர் கொடுப்பேன்
உன் உதடுகள் சிந்திய சொல்லெடுத்து
உன் உயிருக்குள் காதலை எழுதிடுவேன்


எத்தனை முறை நான் இறந்தாலும்
மீண்டும் உனக்காய் அவதரிப்பேன்
எத்தனை முறை நான் உயிர்த்தாலும்
உனை மட்டும் தானே காதலிப்பேன்

Leo da Mirci.

Will soon come up with a crazy blog. Or some crazy kavithais...

Day 22 - Antha Oru Naal (One day Celebrity)

To say that “I am lucky” is an understatement. I have always been lucky, more than lucky. I always got what I wanted. Family, friends, job, education, love etc. etc… I should find some other word to describe it - “Lucky” is really an understatement. But my biggest luck – June 10 2004 here it is!!!

June 8, 2004

• I woke up in my flat, Thiruvanmiyur, Chennai.

• I wore an “I have to wash it at least today” category towel and took bath in cold water.

• There was a small problem with the television. It gets switched off when I switch it on. Got very bored.

• There were a few women from the nearby slums fighting like anything near the ground floor. I learnt two new Tamil words which I will never use.

• The local plumber knocked the room and asked me to donate for some Pooja. I refused. He gave me a look which said “Why do people like you still live in this world?”

• I had breakfast, lunch and dinner alone.

June 10, 2004

• I woke up in Maurya Sheraton, Delhi. (Alex told me that Clinton had stayed there when he came to India.)

• The television in my room had a separate channel to show the channels and the numbers. (They don’t call it a room. These semi-literate people call it a suite. I practiced a lot to pronounce it "sweet" and not "soot")

• For the first time in my life I wore a bath robe. (Or was it the first time I saw it?)

• I took bath in the bath tub for an hour. (Definitely the first time I am taking a...I mean, I am seeing a bath tub)

• Aishwarya Rai was staying one floor below my room.(Has nothing to do with the previous statement)

• This guy smiled at me when I asked him to pose for a photograph. He had a Mangal Pandey moustache.... no he actually was Mangal Pandey. Aamir Khan too stayed in the same hotel. (This actually has something to do with the previous statement - both Aish and Aamir represented Coke)

• Sunil Mittal asked me which place I was from. (Enga oorlayum Airtel connection irukku theriyumaa?)

• Ajith Pal Singh (the captain of the Indian hockey team, last time India won the Olympic gold) traveled in the same bus as I.

• Palache Sen sat next to me. (and gave a boring lecture on how passionate he was about India)

• I shook hands with Aishwarya Rai.(There is a full length comedy story behind it)

• Shankar Mahadevan had dinner with me, same table.

• Drums Sivamani asked me in Tamil, “Ennappa naan nallaa vaasichaenaa?”

• I talked to Mandira Bedi and had my brother talk to her over the phone. (My brother told me later that he asked her, “What is your role in Manmadhan?”. Her reply was - “Wait and Watch” - What else would she say about that role?)

• Saw Vivek Oberoi and Aishwarya together on the stage.(Rumours are afloat that the first spat between them was after I shook hands with Aishwarya)

• Somebody said “Excuse me”. I was obstructing her way. I turned back to see Simran.

• Saw Charu Sharma, Sheila Dikshit, Vijay Mallaya, Sunil Dutt, Anjali Bhagat, Rahul Bose, Kavitha Krishnamurthy, L. Subramaniam and a lot of celebrities.

• I was not that lucky. I could not see Rahul Dravid. (It is a little too much to ask for but I would have sacrificed all the above for that)

• Should be easy to guess why I was a celebrity

June 12, 2004

• I woke up in my flat, Thiruvanmiyur.

• I wore an “I have to wash it at least today+4” category towel and took a bath in cold water…

Hmm.....And life continued as usual.

Day 21 - What should I name it?

"Next time you go to bed, don’t think of how much you have earned that day, how many times your boss appreciated you that day or how many good things your colleagues told about you that day. Think of the time you did not give your loved ones, the time that you sacrificed to get all these. Think whether it is really worth it."
- Leo da Mirci.

My brother is like any other brother in this world. Nothing special. Whenever he comes home we sit around him hearing all the stories that happened in school, college and wherever he had been. He starts talking and we laugh, laugh and laugh. He smiles at everybody. He makes everybody smile. There is not a single person in the world who hates him. There is not a single person in the world whom he has hurt. Every time I told him “Please… do it for me”, he would say “Panraennaa” and run immediately for helping me. If I tell him any of my problems, he would immediately say “Naan irukkaenla anna kavalaipadaathey”(I am there anna. Don’t worry). He calls me “Lae Anna” - the perfect example of the respect he has for me and the very close friendship we share.

The testimonials his friends have written for him in orkut make me feel proud. He is just the type of person this world would be proud of. He goes beyond what he can do to help others, non-materialistic and kind. When he sees children on the road, begging he would say “I will do something for all such children some day. When I get my salary I will help them annaa”. He would have, but the problem is, one year after passing out from college, he hasn’t got his first salary.

I feel responsible. I haven’t spent for him, even 1% of the time I spent helping my friends.

When he was preparing for his entrance exams, he asked me to come home and help him. Instead I chose to spend time with my friends in college.

When he was in college I could have taught him everything. I never cared to. I spent my time enjoying life, creating problems for myself and solving them.

Whenever my mother asked me to teach him during my summer holidays, I told her “Amma, he will study if he wants to”, all because I wanted to enjoy my summer holidays.

When he finished college, he told me that he did not want to get into the software industry. I just asked him to continue searching for a job in the software industry. I did not even spend a minute thinking about what other career options he had. My post graduation became more important to me than his life.

And a lot more Whens… which I did not even care to remember.

Now, I sit down and think of them. I have not done anything for the closest friend I have in life. Agreed, he himself should have done a lot of things. He should have worked hard, he should have done this and that…but I worry because even if he had done nothing, I could have made a lot of difference in his life. But, I chose to be selfish.

Today I talked to him. He talked to me in a very low tone, a tone which was not the cheerful one I love to hear. I was left with a very heavy heart. Every moment my heart beats, it seems to say “If you had spent some time for him he would have been cheerful today”. I don’t know what else to say.